1.45 Letting it all out

Matt wanted to yell but no words would come out so he left the room and slammed the door instead. Hazel went after him asking him to listen but he ignored her pleas. 

Jake and Kay could hear the commotion and went to see what was going on. Most of the dormitory was listening but eventually Jake shooed them away to give Matt and Hazel privacy. Then Kay grabbed Jake’s arm and said quietly that it looked like they needed to be alone.

“Mathew please say something, anything.” Matt wasn’t sure whether he should cry or yell but firmly asked, “You knew how I felt about you so why did you feel you needed to do this?”

“I never gave children a thought until her stunt and the idea of someone else having a baby with you made me angry. A small part of me thought you would leave me to be Dad with her. I want everything with you.”

Matt turned to her and said, “You mean trick me into staying with you…”

“No I…”

“You should never of pulled this stunt…are you pregnant?”

“I don’t know.”

“When you know, you can find me on the couch.”

“Are you leaving me?”

“We will discuss things when you have the result of the pregnancy test.” Hazel went to leave the room but before she left she added, “You should know Matt, I love you and you have every right to be mad but I did it because I see our future together and Deb made me realise that. It is no excuse but it’s the truth.”

Kay walked in to find Matt trying to eat breakfast, “Do you want to talk about it?” He sighed and said, “I need to work this out but thanks anyway.”

“You know where I am if you change your mind.” 

Jake walked in and wrapped his arms around Kay, “Come on we don’t want to be late.” Kay smiled and Matt asked, “Going anywhere nice?”

“Just the cinema,” Jake answered. Matt asked, “Are you going to be gone all day?”

“Why?”

“Kay, can I sleep in the spare bed in your room until you get back?” Kay looked with concern, “Is everything ok?”

“I’ll be fine I just need to sleep. I will explain but not now.”

Matt tried to sleep but it was no good. All he could think about was the betrayal. It was true he loved her with all his heart, after all that is why he asked her to marry him but what he couldn’t understand was why Hazel felt the need to get pregnant on purpose. If she was pregnant then he would feel like he was trapped but if she wasn’t then how would they get through this?

Matt looked up and saw Hazel in the doorway. Every time he looked at her all he felt was love but at the same time disappointment that she couldn’t trust him.

“I’m not ready to talk, Hazel.”

“Please Matt, I can’t stand this.” He looked into those beautiful blue eyes and felt nothing but love but he needed time to make the right decision.

“Please leave.” 

He held open the door and closed it behind her. 

Hazel ran back to their room and cried into the bed and thought, ‘How could you be so stupid. Here is a man that wants to marry you and what do you do stop taking the pill. What did you expect him to say, it’s ok hunny, I’m so happy. Now I’ve blown it and the best man is about to walk out of my life and it’s all my fault.’ It had been six weeks since she had stopped taking the pill so it was entirely possible she was pregnant. She was due on in a few days so she would know then but panic set in. What if she came on but she was pregnant? Hazel couldn’t wait so went to the shop to get a test kit. She had heard that you could get ones that could detect an early pregnancy.

Hazel came back and waited for the bathroom to be clear but the test fell out of her bag as a girl was entering and when she saw the test she ran to tell Matt. 

While she was waiting Matt walked in and asked, “What is the result?” Hazel looked upset at him, “I’m so sorry but would it be so bad?”

“I don’t know. We are supposed to plan for things like this, you know a joint decision. If you are pregnant how are we supposed to support our baby while we are at university? I want us to support ourselves not be living on hand outs. My parents did that but I want to have the home and career in place before we have our family.” 

Hazel yelled back, “What if we fell pregnant by accident, I mean the pill doesn’t always work.”

Matt was furious, “But you’re not on the pill, Hazel.”

 “You are right but I was scared of losing you to Debs and I…I wasn’t thinking clearly.”

“If this is going to work, you have to trust me and tell me how you are feeling, agreed?” Hazel nodded and gave a half smile. “What does the test say?” 

Hazel looked at the result then turned to Matt who now embraced her, “Well are we going to be parents or not?”

Hazel asked, “Are you ok with it either way?”

“Yes I’m ok either way. I love you, so what is the result?”